Glossary

A non-exhaustive glossary of terms commonplace amongst Scalfani observers. You might find these terms be used around CWJki articles.

The following is sorted in two categories; terms generally used around all lolcow circles, and Scalfani-specific terms. Not to be confused with Jack's own linguistic marvels, Jackisms, though some overlap does exist.

General lolcow terms

A-Log

Derived from Chris Chan troll Anthony LoGatto, used to describe someone expressing disproportionate levels of hatred for a lolcow, often including wishing them physical harm, for perceived "crimes" they are deemed "guilty" of.

Cowtipping / Touching the poop / Pozloading the neghole

Derogatory term for the act and consequences of trolling a lolcow.

Lolcow

An eccentric person on the internet who can be "milked" for laughs.

Milk

Content or laughs "milked" from lolcows.

Phonebooking

A less loaded term for the act of unmasking a person online, using public information derived from their social media posts and available databases.

Ween

A petty, often failed troll.

White-knight

Someone defending the honor of a lolcow online.

Scalfani-specific terms

Boys' Club

A term coined by Jack for a place he sends banned chatters to.

Cameltoe Spoon

A red plastic stirring spoon often seen in Cooking with Jack videos. It has a cutout in the handle for slotting it onto pots, which looks like a woman's cooch.

CU Piggy in the flesh.

CU Piggy (Pronounced "See-You Piggy")

A piggy bank depicting Patrick Star from SpongeBob SquarePants which often appears as a prop in Cooking with Jack videos.

Double Intamnity

A play on the 1944 film Double Indemnity. Refers to a theory of Tammy possibly trying to kill Jack, whether directly or indirectly, in order to quickly collect his life insurance.

Gastrosexuality

Sexual attraction to food, which Jack appears to exhibit often.

Grill Graveyard

The wood deck at 157 Trail Ridge Drive which was used by Jack to hoard old grills, reaching 20+ grills at one point.

Financhew Crisis

A spin on the term "Financhu Crisis" by the Chris Chan community, this refers to periods of Jack seemingly having trouble with his (actually Tammy's) finances.

Floppy Bowl

A floppy red plastic bowl often seen in Cooking with Jack videos.

Jerking Off Ten Guys

An alternative interpretation of JOTG.

Keto Bear

A nickname for pastry chef Kirk Hutchinson of Power of the Almond, a bakery in Starkville, Mississippi visited by Jack for JOTG, who Jack got oddly intimate with.

Jim Traynor

A fictional character named after "gym trainer" who fucks Tammy behind Jack's back.

Meat booger

A small blob of ground meat Jack often puts in cooking vessels to assess their temperature before dumping ingredients in.

Meat Marine

A fictional character of a seasoned soldier fighting in the FOOD WARS.

Mommywife

A mock nickname for Tammy, who often acts like a babysitter for Jack.

Murderchurch

A nickname for Cornerstone Church, whose former pastor Maury Davis is a convicted murderer.

Rapechurch

A nickname for Long Hollow Church, where a summer intern was arrested for statutory rape.

The Scalfaniverse / Scalfani Cinematic Universe (SCU)

Nicknames referring to Jack's extended family and friend circle.

Steam glove

Red rubber glove often seen in Cooking with Jack videos. The name was later used by a YouTube chat troll.

Strokebrain

Jack's brain, fried beyond recognition from his several strokes.

Thomas Court

The temporary residence of Jack from 2023-2024 and the current residence of Jack Junior. Some trolls used the name "Thomas Court" to rattle Jack.

WIKI WIKI

An onomatopoeia for the record scratch sound at the beginning of the old Cooking with Jack intro. Also used as an alternative name for the CWJki.